Once again I have been in my damn feelings thinking about my future. More specifically, the future of my love and family life. Who will I end up with (male or female), will I have any children? If I am with a guy how the hell are we gonna pull that off? I am very open to adoption. To be quite honest, if I was to get married to a woman I would want one of our children to be adopted. Can't really explain why. I just know I would love to make a child's life better and show them the love they miss from their birth parents.
However, some people don't believe in adoption. And if they do, many people don't believe the relationship is the same as it would be with a biological child. I must say I disagree. In the age old nature versus nurture debate I have always sided with nurture when it comes down to behavior and family connections. I believe that if you actually put the effort into bonding with a child, or anyone for that matter, you will find you have a close connection that couldn't be any closer if you were related by blood. Granted, I don't know too many adopted children/parents personally. But those I do know, have connections with their adoptive parents that I have with my own father. My cousin and her husband has an adopted son (she's unable to carry a child safely) they have had him since he was a few months old. After a while her and their adoptive son began to have that mother/baby bond we all see. He could be in the back room of the house and when she would come in he was able to sense her. He would start squirming around all of a sudden and whining until she reaches him. All of this, without even seeing her. This is something common of mother and baby, the baby can feel the mother's presence. Although not her biological child, she nurtured him as a mother. Hell, most of us are closer to our best friends than most members of our actual family.
I have always sided with the nurture side because I have seen it take precedent over nature too many times. Think of children close in age, growing up in the same home, had educated and successful parents, given the identical opportunities, but chose different paths. One chooses drugs and violence and the other chose education and a career. Clearly his or her outside influences persuaded them away from the ways of their family. This is why adoption doesn't scare me. I know all cases of adoption aren't perfect and its totally unpredictable. But I'm willing to give it a try in the distant future. It's the future itself that scares me.
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