How do you know its the right time/situation to be with someone? I'm so accustomed to being with myself and not obligated to anyone I've forgotten how to recognize other feelings. We really like eachother, but I think we both are also not one to make the first move in this department. I know of his past experiences, and I am all to aware of my fear of vulnerability. I know, it sounds like a recipe for disaster. I understand taking it slow and not rushing into things, but I also believe there is a time where you have to sink or swim. If there has been anyone in my life (male or female) that I've wanted to try to make it work with, it would be him.
However, I just don't know if these feelings are really what I think they are. Hell, I may be straddling the "L" word with this dude. At least I think so. I really don't know how it feels....and that is sad. In other departmetns of life I'm gucci. I'm successful in school, work, with friends but with this I'm as clueless as they come. I don't even know how to recognize the feelings of wanting to be with someone...officially and exclusively. I mean, what if I'm wrong. The most I know is that we both believe in titles. (And anybody who doesn't needs some type of reality check). But I also know that we both have our reasons why we would want the other to initiate it. Surprisingly, I'm slowly wanting to be that one! I think I'm growing up. LoL I can't lose this. I don't want to mess up this string of blessings I've gotten lately; new job, school, and Sly.
Its a fuckin shame I can't even recognize these feelings. Fear is a bitch.
You guys have been doing a good job of talking things out, so just tell him. Look, y'all both feel the same way, and the good thing about two dudes is there's no blueprint or 'role' for who moves first (sound familiar? lol). Take what you wrote & say it to Sly. Oh, and congrats on the new job!
ReplyDeleteYeah. Man. Life is tough. Even when things are going well, life's problems do not go away. I say appreciate what you've got and how far you've come. There's a lot to be said for the sentiment "you can't hurry love," so take it slow. Sounds like you are digging Sly and he is digging you, so go slow and enjoy what you have in the moment.
ReplyDeleteThe mere fact that you are asking says that it is the right time. Because you want things to be 'perfect' your mind runs a million miles a minute. Try to quiet your thoughts and ask yourself that question: Do I want to take this journey with sly?
ReplyDeleteTrey... In my opinion, the best way to do things is sit him down and tell him that what you all have means a lot to you and that if he feels the same, let's make this shit official. It may not be easy, but certainly necessary. Especially if you're hinting around at that 4-letter word. Nothing sucks more than when someone doesn't reciprocate your feelings...
ReplyDelete--Cogito
I think my biggest fear in all of this is rejection. Which is weird, because that is something that has never truly bothered me before. I always felt like "if you like me good, if not thats cool too...no sweat" but not this time around. Now, if shit doesn't go as planned somebody better be prepared to hear my black ass cry!
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ReplyDeleteIt's never easy for a black man to get in touch with his feelings and then express them verbally. No matter how macho we are or want others to perceive that we are none of us like being rejected.
ReplyDeleteThere's no doubt that you two are feeling each other. I had an extremely close friendship with a guy in my late teens and I let fear keep me from telling him how I felt about him. I promised myself that if I ever had a special connection again with a guy I won't waste it. That's been over twenty years ago and I haven't met a guy like him since. Don't let this chance pass you by Trey...........GO FOR IT!!
That first line is entirely too true. As a black man being in tune with you emotions, or your "sensitive" side is not desired. That's why so many of us are so hard and sometimes unsympathetic. I too had someone I let get away, I will NEVER do it again. We're going out tomorrow (Sunday)...I'm gonna see how it goes.
ReplyDeleteBe ready for that update. LoL